(not so) Politically Correct

     Words are very powerful things.  Obviously I think so, since I use them so much.  One of the lessons I always try to teach my kids is how important words are, and what a profound effect they can have on people.  Also, that words cause a different kind of hurt–cuts and bruises heal, but words can never, ever, be unsaid.  That’s why I raised them to say things like “I’m mad at you” instead of “I hate you.” (Well, Evelyn doesn’t actually say anything. She just hits you when she’s pissed, but that’s another topic altogether.)

     Having said all of that, I think maybe everyone has lost their mind.  Even I have fallen victim to it, and I didn’t really realize it until today.  I found an awesome online community called “Underground Moms.”  It’s a group I fit in to very well, and so that should give you some idea of what it’s like.  Check it out.

     Anyway, I registered my blog, and there’s a spot to make a little statement about yourself for everyone to see, and I referred to my children as “typical” and “special needs.”  I refer to them in those terms most of the time when the context calls for it, and I never even thought about it until today.  Suddenly, it just hit me.  What the hell does that mean? Typical?  Special needs?  WTF??????  What common sense and logic tell me is that I should say I have a normal kid and a disabled or handicapped kid.  These terms do not offend me, and since they are my children, that’s what should matter, right?


     I’ve been around handicapped kids my whole life.  I was three when my sister was born, so I have no memory of a life without her.  She went to school both before and after mainstreaming took place (another blog topic I could hit that I bet would get me some hate mail) and I spent a lot time at her “special school.”  So anyway, it really doesn’t phase me.  And we called them handicapped kids.  In fact, the program which is run by the state of West Virginia to assist families with handicapped kids used to be called “Handicapped Children.”  Guess what it’s called now?  “Children With Special Health Care Needs.”  Really.  Because at some point, someone got offended.  Even the normal kids can’t be called normal, because that implies that the handicapped kids are abnormal.  So now those kids are typical, and the newest term I’ve heard which seems to becoming popular is neurotypical.     

     What is happening to us?  We are so worried about offending someone, and some brain somewhere comes up with this crap, but it has nothing to do with reality.  Maybe we should be a tad more concerned about the fact that we are raising a generation of children to be morally void automatons who have no empathy, ethics, or education.  But that, of course, is just my opinion.

    It seems like we are trying so hard to make it seem like a disabled child is just like all of the other children, but here’s a news flash, folks–they aren’t.  My daughter is different, damn it, and she is special, and yes, she has special needs, but she is handicapped, too.  I’m not ashamed of it, and I don’t have to try and put some pretty, PC phrase on her to make myself feel better.  Maybe normal isn’t a great word, because really and truly none of us are normal–certainly no one in this house–but I guess it’s as good a word as any. 

    Ultimately, I guess what I’m trying to say is that maybe we should get to know the kids themselves instead of worrying about what they are called.  For Evelyn alone, there are thousands of words I could give you that describe her–angel, for example, or devil, depending on the day–but there’s only two that mean anything to me:

Daughter.  Mine.

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5 Comments on "(not so) Politically Correct"

  1. Jill
    08/06/2011 at 6:07 am Permalink

    I agree completely that we’ve gone too far in renaming things so as not to cause offense! We as parents just need to teach our kids – like you say – that words are important, can be hurtful and cannot be unsaid!

    Just stopped by from Wednesday’s blog hop. I’m following you now and hope you’ll stop by my blog sometime too! Have a lovely week.

  2. Jen
    08/06/2011 at 7:41 am Permalink

    Very well said………..how do you categorize normal? Love what you have and know you’re blessed!

    Have a great week and thanks for joining us on I ♥ Blogging Hop

  3. Debbie
    08/06/2011 at 9:46 am Permalink

    Well said. I’m sick of labels. Thanks for the follow. Following you back.
    Debbie from nofiltermom.blogspot.com

  4. Selena
    08/06/2011 at 10:25 am Permalink

    I am the worst person in the world when it comes to not having ANY idea what to call people. I hate that people managed to convince themselves and others that they should take offense to words like “disabled” and “normal”. There are TRULY offensive words out there and I think that we need to teach our kids why those words are offensive rather than trying to explain why words that are simply descriptive and not harmful or hurtful are not to be used. It must be so confusing when you’re little to figure out how words work. I have totally lost track of what I was trying to say.

  5. Dumb Mom
    09/06/2011 at 7:36 pm Permalink

    I never know how to refer to people anymore either. I usually just say the, um, girl who um, you know, she um, can’t like, um until someone fills in the appropriate term. As a member of a group that has been called a ton of things historically lemme just tell you I am black. If I have to be called something I’m good with that. African American is something I just don’t relate to. Just to throw a kink in political correctness! Great post and thanks for stopping by pBd!

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