The Boobies Have It

I’m always interested when boobs are on the news.

A little while back, a Houston woman got some flack in Target for breastfeeding her baby.  A couple of the employees told her to go the fitting rooms to feed her baby, and also informed her that she could get a ticket and/or a fine for indecent exposure.  In response, she organized a “nurse-in” in Houston and a few other cities to protest Target and support breastfeeding in public.

I have always had an interest in this subject, because it, like so many of the things that offend people, seems pretty mild in comparison to actual serious issues in our culture (for example, the fact that Nancy Grace is on television.)  But naturally some uber-conservative idiot somewhere has declared that public breastfeeding is indecent.

Now, I generally have a pretty sour attitude towards women who successfully breast feed, but only because I failed so miserably when I tried to breast feed my children.  I sucked at it (rim shot!) But I’m not sure I get this whole “indecent” thing.  I mean, if I have to look at this:

and this:

every time I go out, what’s the big deal about this?


Now, I will also say I don’t see what the big deal is about being a little discreet.  It doesn’t really hurt to flip a blanket over your shoulder or something like that.  However, I draw a line at having to feed your baby in a restroom.  Allow me to say, HELL NO.  Do you want to eat in a restroom?  YUCK.

How can anyone say that feeding a baby is indecent, and then overlook the little fact that half of the population is walking around essentially naked?  Have you shopped for girl’s clothes lately?  I mean, when did it become culturally acceptable to dress our teenage and pre-teen girls like tiny little prostitutes?  I see shorts in the department store that literally end at the crotch–there is no leg on the shorts! The pockets stick out the bottom, for God’s sake! And feeding a baby bothers you?

Sorry–the naked little girl thing really gets me.  It seems like a much bigger issue than a mother doing what a mother is supposed to do–feed her child.  Like I said, I know you can be discreet about it.  I don’t care for anyone who feels like they have to shove their “rights” (so to speak) in your face.  I saw a girl I went to school with once not too long ago, and she was marching right up the center aisle of Wal-Mart with her boob out and a baby on it.  I can assure you, she wasn’t feeding her baby because that was her right–she was trying to get attention.  Trust me.  Also, I once saw a woman breastfeeding while driving her car down a four-lane highway.  I think all of us can agree how foolish that was.  What if she had gotten milk stains on her upholstery?

All in all, no matter how discrete you are, some people will still be offended.  This is the land of the offended after all.


Even though I suffer from a severe case of sour grapes over the whole breastfeeding thing, I can swallow my pride enough to admit that it is the best thing for a baby.  And anyone who has had a newborn knows you can’t really explain to one that he or she can’t eat right now, because you’re in Target.  So go sit somewhere comfortable, and do what comes natural.  Your baby will thank you!

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One Comment on "The Boobies Have It"

  1. Rachel
    01/01/2012 at 2:17 am Permalink

    As a former lactation conduit for three babies (and for much longer than I would ever care to admit), I second everything you say here. I could not have said it any better. I also agree a little discretion would not hurt. In the same vein I do not like this modern trend of celebrating every dark “mommy moment” a mother ever has. I strongly, STRONGLY disagree with mothers voicing their resentment, boredom and occasional hatred for their children. There is a reason these thoughts are called “dark”. They should never be exposed to children in the same way children should be shielded from violence, profanity and nudity. By all means, tell them when they are grown that you at times found them to be little assholes, but for the love of motherhood DO NOT DO IT when they are little. Admit it to you closest friend if you must, but don’t put it on the internet where your child might see or hear of it.

    As always, another great post and happy 2012! 🙂

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